Guest Blog by Connor Hodgson

Well writing an entry into Kirbys blog had never really crossed my mind until this morning, but I know just how much Kirby will enjoy reading this and I have already promised not to embarrass her too much. Firstly, I would like to say just how proud I am of Kirby doing this blog and I have took real enjoyment from reading it, whenever a new entry is posted, but not only that I have learned things myself so thank you! Secondly, I would like to apologise for the abundance of grammatical errors and the inevitable spelling mistakes I am about make but here goes!

Me and Kirby have known each other all of our lives and in some ways grew up together, our parents have been good friends for years and years meaning we often spent time together at family and friends parties. Although we were not always close Kirby was always someone I looked out for and someone I always enjoyed seeing and catching up with. It was at one of these family parties that we actually got together, my cousin Amy’s 21st birthday. I turned up late after having one or two many beers beforehand but in no time I was sat with my 2 cousins and kirby, We were just chatting away as we always do but my other cousin Zoe messaged me to say ‘could you be flirting with Kirby any more’ I hadn’t actually realised at the time and it wasn’t my plan but apparently it worked. Before we knew it we were off hand in hand round the town and threw in a few pub snogs for good measure and we were more than friends!

Up to then I hadn’t really any idea what Kirby had already been through or even that she was poorly in any way, I knew she hadn’t been too well before the party but never realised to what extent! Anyway, our first date I suggested the next day to get out for a walk round a local water and grab some food after at a nice pub to cure the hangovers. Sounded great to me but I can’t imagine how difficult it must of been for Kirby, a longish drive in my car, no toilets around and then to eat before the drive home. Luckily it went great and Kirby somehow managed, although I’m sure she will have been plagued with worry all day. To me nothing would of mattered as nothing could of stopped me feeling the way I did about her. Things moved really fast with us as we didn’t have to get to know each other really, so we skipped all the nervous small talk and were really close right from the off after a week or so there was nothing worth knowing about Kirby that I didn’t already know, and nothing at all had put me off! That’s one thing with us both we shared everything and I feel like we went through things together.

What I remember of when Kirby was suffering with her colitis she never really had good days and bad they were all pretty much the same to me, she was tired a lot, in a lot of pain and using the bathroom a lot! None of this stopped us from doing anything however as Kirby really powered through but she will be the first to admit that some things we did were compromised. The compromise was never a bad thing by the way just something we had to do to be able to enjoy it! Some of this was Kirby not eating at certain times or at all to get through not being able to use the bathroom or, after a nice meal getting right back to the room so she felt comfortable! No matter where we were in the world or what we were doing nothing to me was ever effected because I was doing what I loved, travelling, with the person I loved, Kirby.

The next thing I wanted to talk about was surgery, A huge operation for someone so young to go through and although it scared the shit out of me from day 1 it was something I was so behind! From the first time it was mentioned I knew it would change Kirbys life for the better. This was going to eliminate 90% of her problems and allows her to get her life back and live it to the full. The downside was having to go through surgery which if anyone has had to endure this themselves or like me see someone they love go through it then they will understand just how hard this can be. For me I worried about Kirby everyday already but the day of the surgery I have never been as scared about anything in my life. By far the longest day and the longest 6/7/8 hours ever, I remember like yesterday trying to keep my mind off it but no matter what we did or how hard I tried I couldn’t get that sick sinking feeling out of my chest. Even after seeing Kirby 1 hour post op high as a kite and purple with bruising i never felt like it was over and that feeling of fear never left until after Kirby was home. One thing I would say is I would never change any of it and it was all okay but it is hard to explain just how difficult it was knowing what was happening!

Kirbys operation gave her an illeostomy meaning she now has a bag, this is something I haven’t mentioned yet as I almost forget that she even has one, to me now it’s the most normal thing in the world and actually such an amazingly simple thing that allows Kirby to do all the things she wants in life, I know a lot of people and especially young women would of hated having there bodies changed this much but for us and I hope Kirby doesn’t mind me speaking for her I think it’s a small price to pay to get her life back and the things that it has allowed us to do far exceed the negatives, and as I said earlier it is now normal and Kirby embraced it better than I ever thought she would and I think the fact that I am completely accepting and normal about it really helped her.

Travelling is our passion and something we dream of every day and night so when comparing before and after surgery it seems only right to use the times we enjoy the most. Since Kirby has gotten her digestive system rework there has been absolutely zero times I can remember her complaining about it, it has done nothing but improve her standard of living and both of our lives. Something that has changed Kirbys body so much has given her a normal life again and made travelling so much easier. There is no using aeroplane toilets mid take off or running up the Spanish steps to the nearest bathroom, there is no skipping breakfast or not drinking alcohol and never once has wearing a bikini been a problem!

I have so much more I could write so maybe I will get a second go at this as I know it’s all over the place but this is a start. I do want to end on saying just how amazing Kirby has always been and how modest she is about it all, she has been through some pile of ups and downs and is the strongest person I’ve ever met. Thank you for indulging me

Connor

3 thoughts on “Guest Blog by Connor Hodgson

  1. Connor is right about you kirby being an inspiration. Connor you are also an inspiration and we couldn’t wish for a more thoughtful, kind and supportive person for kirby to be with xxxx

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